This week I have been reading books by Dean Koontz, the master of horror storytelling at a thriller pace. I like his books because they often feature animals, often dogs. Also, he provides just enough description in his sentences to give information while allowing the action to move forward. An example of this are two sentences from "Watchers":
"Over there, a narrow field was choked with waist-high brown grass as crisp as hay, a few bristly clumps of mesquite, and some sprawling oleander bushes with roots deep enough to keep them green. When he stared directly at the field, he saw none of the movement he thought he had caught from the corner of his eye, but he suspected that he had not imagined it."
My two sentences are from my dark fantasy manuscript, Passage:
“Grasping a prominence on the ledge above, he pulled up on it, only to feel it give way and go crashing to the talus slope below.
As his body swung outward, he flung the free arm into the rock, bashing his knuckles but somehow managing to get his hand jammed in the crack.”
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Not a Good Eye Witness
2 hours ago